I hate my mother
I hate my parents, My mother for being a bitch and my father for letting her do whatever she wanted with me.But I hate her the most, I absolutely hate her...I've tried not to...but I do-
She allowed the molestation- I confronted her about it when I was 17- she didn't do anything about it- It had already stopped years ago...but I didn't think she would invite this asshole to my little sisters party two weeks later. She used to kick me out, throw me in the street because my shirt was a little too baggy, because she didn't want to see my face. She didn't want me to go to college I know it. Every graduation I ever had, she ruined it for me. She used to kick my ass for no reason when I was small..and when I see how she is with my siblings, I can't help but wonder what is it about me that she fucking hated sooooooo much- To the point where she would constantly tell me that I ruined her life- She doesn't know how bad she fucked me over- We had an argument a couple of years ago, and I threw that in her face again, that she allowed for this individual to molest me- I was five and it continued until I was seven- She said I was old enough to know better- and it is MY fault- I couldn't believe it-
I honestly hope she dies the most horrible death sometimes...and I try to feel bad about feeling this way afterwards...but I just can't-
I can't forgive her
- Wow, that's a really clever way of thnkniig about it!
- I think Aldous Huxley had it right in Brave New World. The immediate family has done nothing but damaged the children of the world. My mother did quite a number on me. All I can say is that your mother is not human. She does not deserve your forgiveness. There are just some people who are beyond salvation. It is blatant that your mother is one of those... I sincerely apologize for your hardships and I wish there was more I could do.
- damn, you know what your mother needs?? a good old fasion ass kicking
- what you're feeling is normal. it is a mother's job to protect her children, and it doesn't sound like your mother did that. the molestation was never your fault. at ages five and seven, there is no knowing better. there is no knowing better at 17. there is no excuses for a monster to abuse you like that, and there' no excuse for your mother choosing a man over your safety and well-being. i don't advocate hate, but i totally understand how you feel. the best i can tell you to do, is to get yourself some therapy and keep your mom out of your life until she acknowledges responsibility for not protecting you from the monster who molested you. she may never, but you go on with your life. you can do anything you set your mind to, so just believe in yourself. i'm so sorry to hear about what happened to you, and you have my deepest empathy. i will keep you in your prayers. and like everything, forgiveness is something that takes time and something a person has to work at. just because you can't forgive now, doesn't make you a bad person. i'd be angry too. i'm no angel, but often find that prayer helps me, and so does my belieft in god. but, you know what will be best for you, so go ahead and do that. i will be rooting for you, and i will keep you and your situation in kind thought and deepest prayers towards you. take care.
- young lady.. I cannot speak for the dispicable acts your mother did and allowed.. all i can say it trust in god..if we want god to forgive us, then we HAVE to forgive others.. no matter how bad they did us.. I know this does not seem right, but it is.. i invite you to read something, some blogs that i wrote.. go to www.myspace.com/dwaltsr.. read my blog entitled "are you a victim".. you have to click on "view all blog entries", then scroll down to "are you a victim?".. feel free to read my other blogs there.. and I hope that you find some kind of inspiration to reconsider. I'm not saying be friends.. etc.. just pray, and find it in your heart to do for others what we constantly ask the lord to do for us.. god bless.